Feminine and masculine energy - yin & yang
We are all born with both feminine and masculine energy in us, regardless of whether you were born a biological girl or boy, or whether you are female or male or in between or do not define yourself by a specific gender at all.
But we live in a time where the feminine is neglected in both men and women, which has major consequences for ourselves, our relationships and the planet.
In cultures that focus on production, growth and continuous action, the feminine has been devalued and seen as an enemy.
The feminine is seen as passive, yielding, soft, sentimental, emotional and yielding, which are qualities that are not accelerated to such an extent in our modern society, where efficiency, mastery and growth are key words.
When our value as a human being is constantly measured by how much we can produce, we unconsciously suppress the parts of us that are naturally cyclical and feminine.
Many remain in a masculine mood, even though the body and mind are crying out for peace and deep silence.
I have long worked with the goddess energy, e.g. in Mary Magdelene, Aphrodite, Kali and Hekate, but here recently I have been drawn to work with a masculine god as well.
I have to admit that I have never understood religion because many major religions focus on a masculine god.
When I was 15 years old, however, I came across information about Wicca and was inspired by the belief in nature, the magic, the rituals and the great focus on both the god and the goddess, the masculine and the feminine, the sun and the moon, the sky and the earth.
In Wicca, both the god and the goddess have equal value and both are important for balance, joy and abundance in life. I just didn't really understand how to practice it.
But I will let you in on a secret…
When I started my sexual healing 1.5 years ago, I was deeply drawn to re-establish my relationship with nature, the earth, the roots and the feminine. I had such a hard time feeling myself at the time, and I found comfort and faith out among the wild landscape.
It was the height of summer and I found a secret place near bushes and trees and a high hill where I could be alone and just be and feel the contact with my womb and the earth. I lay in the tall grass surrounded by insects, butterflies and birdsong and massaged my breasts, circled my hips and touched myself sensually and sexually.
As I lay there naked, I imagined myself merging with the earth and surrendering to the sky and the penetrating rays of the sun. I felt the warmth of the sun's rays against my body and the good support of the earth beneath me.
I prayed to Mother Earth and the Sun God.
I was so unhappy and felt so dis-associated from my own sexuality and femininity that I needed some kind of divine intervention.
I looked up at the sky and imagined myself making love to a masculine god. How I merged with him.
Eyes closed, I touched myself as I imagined the rays of the sun from this divine masculine presence penetrating my vagina and healing me.
I had an orgasm in the grass.
I felt so wild, free and connected to the nature around me and to the sky above me and the earth below me.
And when I opened my eyes... The first thing I saw up there in the sky was a cloud that looked so much like a man with a big hard member. And he looked down at me.
A day or two later, a woman in a sensual women group on facebook shared a picture showing a sky man and an earth woman having sex.
I couldn't help but laugh. What a coincidence.
But I saw it as a sign of the urge to let the masculine and the feminine merge in an erotic, sensual encounter.
I'm not just talking here about the meeting between a man and a woman in deep intimate sex... Of course I do that too.
But it's about balancing feminine and masculine energy – yin & yang – within oneself.
As it is today, boys learn from an early age to distance themselves from the feminine, and this has consequences for them later in life.
Men have an eternal longing for the feminine – the longing to merge with a woman who is completely open to receive him.
The feminine is our home, the hearth where we recharge and nourish ourselves with love, intimacy and care.
The feminine is inherent in every woman's womb. And in Mother Earth.
It is our nourishment and care.
But many women are closed and do not have contact with their pelvis and with the fire that burns inside the womb.
Most women carry around very deep wounds from the masculine. We've probably all been through failure, break-ups and heartbreak because of a guy. This means that we already have the barricades up when we have to meet a new man.
But on an even deeper level, all women actually carry around wounds that stem from centuries of men raping, oppressing and feeling ownership over women.
It is hurt, guilt, shame and failure that we as women are already born with and come from generations of women before us.
These deep wounds prevent women from opening up fully to a man – becoming soft and surrendering in our feminine nature.
Our aloofness and anger towards the masculine and what it has done also keeps women from using her own masculine energy to step out into the world and express her creative projects and gain success and wealth with it.
It is so important that both men and women heal the wounds we carry around the feminine & the masculine, because that way we can get better harmony in ourselves, in relationships, in finances and on our planet.
When you heal the feminine and the masculine, you come home to the person you were born to be.